Thursday, September 28, 2017

to accompany the previous post...

... an oddball story about a true, actual home invasion. As Dave Barry, the highly amusing Miami newspaper columnist often said: 'I am not making this up.' Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction. I know the people involved, so I do not doubt the veracity of the story, so ridiculous you could not invent anything this crazy.

I read the report in the paper, and brought it to the attention of The Man Who Lives Here. He is a regular volunteer at the National Infantry Museum, and will see the couple who this happened to when they are all at their volunteer posts. He reported enjoying hearing them tell about it, even though is is really difficult to digest as true.

The couple who lives a couple of blocks away called the police to come investigate after the husband went up in the attic because they heard 'something' there. The public safety guy also went up in the attic and could not find anything. But the police went out and walked around in the yard, looking for possible cause of odd bumping and thumping sounds. Thinking: maybe an animal on the roof? They found evidence of someone having been in a storage shed. Clothing, a back pack, shoes.

There was more noise in the attic, so they went back up to poke around more. Whereupon they found a man who had somehow gotten in, and covered himself with insulation, trying to disappear. After he was discovered, and being removed from the attic, he apparently mis-stepped and came through the ceiling. Did I say he was naked? Yep.

I understand from The Man Who Lives Here and got the story first-hand from the volunteering couple, there was considerable evidence that the miscreant was on drugs. I cannot say why he would climb up on the roof and break in the house, or hide in the insulation, or do these things in his birthday suit. But I have reliable sources. His backpack was filled with candy and ice cream. Not a particularly smart thing to take to a picnic out in the country, miles from refrigeration. But a naked guy on meth. coming through your ceiling is not my definition of particularly smart.

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