1: simultaneous and contradictory attitudes or feelings (as attraction and repulsion) toward an object, person, or action (not according to Webster: also includes retail work)
2: continual fluctuation (as between one thing and its opposite)
This little jobette,out in the retail world, where I have been for nearly sixteen years - if you looked up 'ambivilence' in the dictionary, you might find me there. There are days when I wonder why I keep at it. If you could take a giant step backwards, and get far away to be able to look at the big picture (which would probably require standing on the moon) it is a really good company to work for.
Lots of benefits and reasons to want to be employed there. A good retirement plan, with the company kicking in a bit to help your investment grow. Health benefits, as well as a plan that would provide if you were disabled, hurt on the job and out of work for an extended period. (None of which applies to me and other part-time employees.) Even a little policy to cover dental and eyes, which recently was offered to part time workers, very beneficial when I had to get work done in my mouth.
But I'm having a hard time wanting to go in: the guy who does the floral dept. has been off for several days, so I am doing his job. It has gotten remarkably 'regular', for someone who usually works about fourteen hours a week. It's nice to get a bigger paycheck, but that time commitment is beginning to weigh me down.
Being the person (who is accused by close relatives:) driving all over the state like my shirt tail is on fire, it's difficult to also be the one who is conscientious, dependable, reliable, on time, steadfast, on a daily/regular basis.
It will be nice to get a paycheck that is more than pocket change, even though a full time job would probably not be sufficient to keep out of the red every month. So I will attribute the problem of being constantly in the 'red' to my considerable travels. Going to see people I really like, being with folks I care about enough that I can't stay in one place more than a couple of days. Do you want to get on my list?
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