good news...

...or not, depending on how it all evolves. I was so frustrated, angry, distraught, confused, and generally all round miserable by the time I got home last night, it was time to do something different. After cursing and swearing all the way home, venting when there was no one around to hear all my @#$% and &*+?, I felt like I had run out of expletives.

So I went today to apply for another job. I've been thinking about it for months, and finally decided it's time to make a change. Partially due to the people who have been hearing me say all these years: Life Is Too Short To Be Miserable. When they start quoting it back to me, it's pretty obvious: 1) they retained the message, and 2) they understand it's something I need to hear/apply/take to heart. Funny how we can get to the point of one day suddenly realizing: 'I sound like my mother'... and now here I am hearing my long-lived quote coming out of my daughters' mouths. Even funnier, or ironic, is that I have had this particular job app. in my car for a couple of months, when someone gave it to me at church, and I was not yet ready to foment change. I got to the front door of the store, and realized I already had what I was going in there for, so sat in my car in the parking lot and filled it out.

I told someone I know there is great danger in using the 'h' word in reference to employment. And I know it is not truly appropriate, that if that were my only complaint/concern, I have to admit that the things I have been counseled about are all legitimate. But I do feel 'hounded'. And I do feel like I am continually in the sights/crosshairs. Like I am the one getting continually bashed in 'whack-a-mole'. So though I cannot use the 'b' word, this situation is untenable.

No reason to expect anyone else to change, so it has become obvious I am the one who needs to make a change. For the several references required, as you would expect, I named names of people who love me. Why would anyone give contact information for someone who would have disparaging comments to make about reliability, trustworthiness, timeliness? So...we'll see...