Tuesday, November 17, 2015

"the only normal people.."

"The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well."
                                                      ~ Alfred Adler, Austrian psychologist (1870-1937)

Having long had the opinion that we ALL come from dysfunctional families, I am  more convinced each day that there is no such thing as 'normal'. The reason we believe other people might/may be leading 'normal' lives is due to the blessed fact that we are not privy to their private activities, things they do when they are certain no one will know/see what goes on behind closed doors. Most of which we should be thankful we do not know about, coming under the heading of TMI. Fortunate that they are not sharing things we really don't need to know. Like the co-worker who was telling about needing to make a dr. appt., so she could report that her 'implants were leaking'. I'm sure I did not need to know that, and cannot imagine any other casual acquaintance who would feel differently.

Growing up, we all believe the places we live, homes we inhabit, families we are surrounded by are, for the most part 'normal'. As children we accept the circumstances of our lives and relatives at face value, their attributes and quirks as nothing out of the ordinary. As we grow, we gradually begin to widen our circle, develop friendships. That provide opportunities to explore relationships, get a glimpse into homes and lives different from our own experience.  Peeking in from the outside, as if peering in the windows, observing people to whom we are not bound by DNA. Gradually becoming aware that other families have a different version of 'normal'.

Looking back, my childhood was in some ways remarkably ordinary and conventional. But also not. Experiences that shaped my psyche linger still, and have affected every relationship through out my life. And continue to have an impact today, many years later. The people who made me who I am continue to have a profound impact -- in many ways positive. I treasure the memories and history of grandparents and parents who shaped my life, people of strong moral character and high standards. People who would consistently do the right thing, regardless of personal risk. I continue to be thankful for those people in my life, providing the history of compassion and good deeds, serving their families, communities with their efforts to make the world a better place.

But  were they normal?  What is normal, anyway?

No comments:

Post a Comment