how to outsmart oneself in three easy steps...

.... even though this could easily be the title of something silly I find my self doing on a daily basis, this actually happened several days ago. I am just now sufficiently over feeling like a complete dolt and ready for True Confessions. It has taken me a week to get past the embarrassment, even though no one else was a witness. Ready to share something readers will find amusing while I am still feeling like a complete goof-ball as I confess...

Step 1.) When you bring home a loaf of bread knowing at least half will go in the trash, you should put some in the freezer. I divided the loaf, and put four slices each in three zipper bags to put in the freezer so I am not letting the bread sit around so long it turns into a middle school science project. Now half the loaf is tucked away and a slice or two can be easily thawed at room temp. when needed.

Step 2.) Take one of the handy little packages of frozen bread out of the freezer when you expect someone will want to make a sandwich, so it will be thawed and ready for ham and cheese. Notice that he only made one sandwich, so there are still two slices of bread, available for eating.

Step 3.) Remove one of the two slices from the zipper bag, when you come home from work to find some lunch. Spread peanut butter and jelly on the bread to eat. Go sit on the couch, with hopes of taking a twenty minute nap before returning to work. Jump up from the couch, discovering you took a thirty minute nap, thinking: Late!  Decide to grab another PBJ, speedily spreading the bread to eat it on the way back to clock in. As you are putting the jelly on top of the peanut butter, realize you failed to take the second slice of bread out of the zipper bag.

Step 3a.) Now you have to take the bread out of the bag (hide the evidence) and start over. Put the bag in the trash, so no one will know what a doofus you are, and remake your half sandwich. Dash out the door and back to work. I did not see any point in sharing experience with co-workers, and letting them know the truth. Not likely any of them read this so none the wiser....