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not sure why...

Friday, December 9, 2016
...I would have deliberately done something that pains me. And can tell before it even starts that it will be hugely un-fun. But I did it anyway, meaning I need to go ahead and give  my-foolish-self a good talking to for establishing a Change in Attitude.

Tuesday the 6th was the day all the would-be substitute teachers were required to report to the school district office to be reinstated as properly approved teachers for hire in lieu of contracted workers. I went, with assigned paperwork completed to be documented, and have been indoctrinated. And just this morning, I laid in my warm cozy bed, thankful for electricity, and pondered the question: Why?

What in the world makes me want to go to the trouble to do that to myself? When I have historically had days I would rather suffer the results of dropping a brick on my toe than spend eight hours in a classroom? Accidentally accepting jobs where I find myself in such a stressful environment that I contemplate leaving by mid-morning. Willing to forgo the pay just to get out of the situation. I was in one classroom last year (where I think I had accepted a different job, and was asked to adjust to meet the needs of another absence) where I really knew I was in the wrong place. The really sad part is that they were eight year olds.

There has been some turn-over in the department that supervises substitute teachers, with the man who worked the designated position for many years retiring recently. The new employee has instituted some major changes: including the requirement that a sub. must work twenty days a year to remain 'in good standing', and continue to be employed as a replacement. I failed to take this edict  seriously, resulting in a letter saying 'you can reapply if you would like'. My thinking is that there are always days when positions go unfilled, so forcing potential subs. out of the system is foolhardy. But what do I know? Apparently not much.

I reapplied, went to the meeting, and signed more papers, agreeing to comply with requirements. Along with over a dozen others, quite a few retired teachers. We were given the option of being re-activated immediately or starting Jan. 9. The problem with starting now is the necessity for getting in twenty days of work by the end of school in May. Whereas if you wait till the next semester starts, you are only obligated for ten days. Which is a lot in a bad situation. But trying to get twenty is a lot x 2. So I chose January, putting off the misery until next year....

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