...in the quiet with my brother over recent days, I noticed that his wife had started writing his obituary. This may sound maudlin, but she knew. The surgeon had given a very clear picture of what the future held when these two people made the decision to return home upon discharge. They chose: no rehab, no nursing facility. Like so many people who have the sense of' being held against their will' in hospital beds: he just wanted to go home. To the place of comfort and safety he had known for so many years.
She had been keeping a journal to help document meds., give sitters a place to make notes, and just generally keep tabs from day to day in their profoundly fractured lives. There, on the back page of the lined, spiral bound notebook, she had begun to gather her thoughts for the inevitable. I sat in the quiet, just being nearby, listening to him breathe. Began to look over the notes about meds. for the past weeks and months, glancing through the history of what their lives has been like since mid-January. I came to the condensation of seventy years of a full, rich, busy life. And added a few lines to the page she had written. There is always a narration, in chronological order, from birth through the years of education and career, but often nothing to help readers better form an image of the man who walked through this world and made an impact on so many diverse lives.
"His mother said of his Dad, 'He was happiest when something was broke and needed fixing'. This is even more true of Tom - the inveterate tinker-er. He was the consummate problem solver, a career trouble shooter. A man who would, like his dad, much rather take anything apart, repair and re-assemble than purchase a replacement. Tom was beloved by coworkers who believed wholeheartedly there was no technical glitch on the planet he could not puzzle out to figure a solution. He was loved even more by his family, who daily witnessed his ability to ponder, consider, 'sleep on it' and come up with a creative, ingenious out-of-the-box method to fix any appliance, tool or broken toy presented to him that needed attention.
Tom was raised by generations of people who loved the Lord, in an extended family faithful in their attendance and attention to the needs of church and community. As a long standing member of New Bridge Baptist, he was generous with his time and skills as well as financial resources. Often the first to arrive and last to leave, he loved his church family as devotedly as the wife, sons and those delightful grandchildren he leaves behind.
To his family, friends and coworkers over a long richly blessed, joy-filled life, he was a caring compassionate, God-loving man. We will all miss his wisdom, wry wit and bad jokes, good attitude and tinkering skills. And with great anticipation, await the Joy of what comes next: ...'today, you will be with me in paradise.' (Luke 23-24)"
The memorial service will be next Sunday afternoon at the church they attended for over forty years.
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