Wednesday, February 3, 2010

The Rescue, part II

The 'Friend' decided she would be o.k. after 48 hours of keeping everyone on Spence Ave in complete turmoil, going through the detox process from having so much to drink she should not even be alive: but she is.

So she came back to the place of 'you keep doing what you're doin', you keep gettin' what you got'. Daughter said she provided Friend with advice/info., so she knows where to get help locally, but we all know that you can't save someone who does not want to be rescued.

Once again, I can be so very overwhelmingly thankful for the blessing of daughters who have made smart choices. While at the same time, having a huge ache for a mom who feels helpless, does not know what else she can possibly do to try to save her girl from self-destruction.

I got a very frustrated, angry, tear-laden call about how aggravatting and irritating it is to have someone who needs assistance to find 'the system' littered with potholes, barricaded by roadblocks. Obstacles that appear to deliberately designed to prevent those who reach out from getting connected to the resources that we all mistakenly assumed are in place, and created to provide propping-up. I know that this young woman is making the decisions, but even if they are bad/poor choices: when she was ready, receptive, reaching out to get help with making changes, it is so sad that the system failed when she asked/wanted/was ready for help.

It's hard to know what to say: being (sadly) confident she will fall back into that same dark place, filled with demons found in alcohol and pills will occur, OR being determinded to make the effort to remember that young woman more frequently when sending out loving thoughts with wings... probably both have a lot of merit.

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